Friday, July 25, 2014

Aluta Continua!

When you walk into a food shop, with your hunger, and some money in hand, you can buy a sandwich and eat and not be hungry anymore. Happiness. 

If you walk into a food shop with your hunger, without money, you leave with that hunger. This, even though the sandwich is still there; can be consumed; can solve your hunger. Fuckedupness. 

I feel like a Slave. THE END 


Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Growing pains

 
PRE SCRIPT: I drafted this a while back (May 2012). Just read it. Can't remember why I didn't post it. It was true at the time, so here:
 
 
Will this blog still be worthy if I don't start it with "So"?
And the "others" is me. :)
 
 
 
 
Ignore that thought. This is what's up:
 
I have what could be termed, Peter Pan Syndrome. You know that boy who just wouldn't grow up? Yes. Except I'm a girl and I can't help but only wish I didn't grow up. I cannot really control things outside of my imagination. Definitely not anything our dear Mother Nature has decided to decide upon without consultation. She never consults. And if I had that option still, I would probably just go for growing like everyone else.
 
 
My thing with growing up though, is not so much that I don't want to age. It's more, I like my 12 year old soul and would like to keep a fresh outlook on life for as long as I can. I would even go as far as telling you that I have actually thought about the kind of parent I want to be and I settled on: COOL.
Life is wonderful. For the most part. (I just exhaled very loudly. Is that what sighing is?). I was saying, life is awesome. My move to Johannesburg has totally been a great decision so far. (This is where people would say: it's had its ups and downs...I hate that phrase). It has not been without its challenges, that’s for sure. And the challenges are the ones holding my interests in this life. Challenges. Holding up my interest in the palm of their collective hand. Me. Looking on in wonder and stumbling with the grace of a young gazelle.
I moved here because my job was a snore. That's what it sounded like for the most part. Servers snoring away in their server rooms, except their snoring represented, not sleeping. I got here and I managed to find myself a neat job in what's known as, "the corporate world", as opposed to the government world.
 
I was born and raised in Bloemfontein, in the Free State. But professionally, in the last 7 months, I can definitely say, I grew up in Jo'hustling'burg!
The corporate world is tough. Here, you are not paid for your hours. You are paid for your skill. All the skills you have, actually, if you use them well.
Disclaimer: I am not saying Government (only) pays people for hours. I just know some people in government who get paid for showing up and being there. I was one of them for the most part. At some point *tears*.  I applaud everyone who actually does work and takes pride in it.
 
Moving on! Everything you do and say here directly affects the bottom line. As much as I thought that I would jump straight into the right frame of mind for the job, I had to remember that I am human. The habits I got used to, even when they annoyed me and I complained about them, were still right here next to me. They sat there and they waited for me to tend to them and they giggled because they could see that my change of environment hadn't affected our relationship. But I have had to say goodbye.
                                                                                                                                         
There's a reason this city shines how it does. People here WORK. Maybe not all. But where I am at, people work.People work hard. A pothole does not stay gaping for more than a month. A sad comparison to the fact that back at home, upon entry, you are welcomed by one big pothole and are lucky if you experience bits of tar road in it. Yes, I exaggerate, but how else will you see my point? I make this example to show that it's not just in IT where you find that productivity is actually measured on results, not on how many hours you can spend playing the solitaire and not fall asleep
I don't want to complain. The point: I have thrown myself completely into the deep end and in stereotypical black fashion, my swimming skills have been, questionable. But I am learning. A lot. And I am definitely brushing up on those swimming skills. Hence the exhaling heavily. It helps with the survival.
Johannesburg has a lot to offer. I have a lot of growing up to do still. It will be fun. I will let go on the dance floors I frequent and keep the song in my heart, that keeps me forever young, forever alive.
Now, let me get back to that line at the bottom.
 
:n